Do you desire gain?

More than you fear loss?

Fear or Desire

Like the little boy in this photo, desire drives him to reach for what he wants. He doesn’t consider the Fear of falling although that’s a real possibility.

We have an emotional association for everything that we attach to pleasure or pain. Many of our decisions are based on either desire or fear – desire to move toward something or fear of what might be. What is your basic motivation – Fear or Desire?

When putting together your social media business plan, are you operating out of DESIRE for incredible branding, website traffic, leads and growing revenues or because you FEAR the company may not get any LIKES, Shares, Comments or engagement and fail?

When putting together your annual business plan, are you operating out of DESIRE for incredible growth or because you FEAR the company may fail?

Are you working hard because you DESIRE to produce outstanding work or because you FEAR what may happen if you don’t? FEAR that your competition is overtaking you and you’ll be left behind.

When you do something special for your spouse, do you do it because you DESIRE to please them or because you FEAR they may be mad or displeased if you don’t?

What is driving your decisions? 

What if you could understand the psychology of social media and use that knowledge to bring customers closer, give them more of what they want, and create better relationships?


Unless you have been hiding under a rock you will know that social media is a key part of running a business in 2017. According to the last Sensis Social Media Report, almost 50% of consumers use social media every day.

Yet only 31% of small – medium sized businesses have an effective social media engagement strategy.

Do you have one?

Struggles with social media include lack of time and resources, too many platforms and not knowing where best to position your brand.

  • What to post.
  • Whether to use paid advertising.
  • Confusion about the best times to post.
  • How much personal content to share.
  • How to engage customers who are overwhelmed with content.

One of the major things I see in hesitating to use social media for business, is a a lack of confidence in your thoughts and ideas. This is a normal part of life for lots of people, and particularly if you work in your own business.

The Power of Why_Prepare1 Image

When creating a social media strategy you need to tap into your WHY, understand what you are using social media for, who are your audience and what do they need?

Making sure to create excellent content and building in self care tactics, will increase your self confidence and your success.


What would happen if you were to “LIKE” everything you saw on social media?

The likes, comments and posts we share on social media can often seem inconsequential, but they matter. They tap into some of the very elements that make us human, our addictions, desires, anxieties and joys.

Fuzzy Desire - Prepare1 Image

Social media biology: Dopamine and Oxytocin

The pull of social media addiction isn’t all in our heads. It’s quite real, thanks to two chemicals our brains produce: Dopamine and Oxytocin


Dopamine is stimulated by unpredictability, by small bits of information, and by reward cues—pretty much the exact conditions of social media.

The pull of dopamine is so strong that studies have shown tweeting is harder for people to resist than cigarettes and alcohol.


Then there’s oxytocin, sometimes referred to as “the cuddle chemical” because it’s released when you kiss or hug.

Or … tweet. In 10 minutes of social media time, oxytocin levels can rise as much as 13%—a hormonal spike equivalent to some people on their wedding day.

And all the goodwill that comes with oxytocin—lowered stress levels, feelings of love, trust, empathy, generosity—comes with social media, too.

As a result, social media users have shown to be more trusting than the average Internet user. The typical Facebook user is 43% more likely than other Internet users to feel that most people can be trusted.

So between dopamine and oxytocin, social networking not only comes with a lot of great feelings, it’s also really hard to stop wanting more of it.


Fear of failure, the single biggest reason for failure in adult life. Fear of failure settles in your solar plexus and paralyzes you, stopping you from even taking the first step. In order to be all you can be, including becoming a millionaire, the first thing you have to learn to do is to confront your fears.

You must learn to control your fears, to master your fears, act in spite of your fears, and be goal oriented in order to gain financial independence.

Fear of Failure

Fear is a vital response to physical and emotional danger—if we didn’t feel it, we couldn’t protect ourselves from legitimate threats. But often we fear situations that are far from life-or-death, and thus hang back for no good reason.

Who wants to embarrass themselves on Social Media? Or what you post and share…Nobody responds or cares.

Maybe we have a fear of technology and don’t know how to post on a mobile Facebook app, so we don’t.

Traumas or bad experiences can trigger a fear response within us that is hard to quell. Yet exposing ourselves to our personal demons is the best way to move past them.

Fortunately, all fears are learned; no one is born with fears. Fears can therefore be unlearned by practicing self discipline repeatedly with regard to fear until it goes away.


“Why are some people more successful than others?”

Philosopher Bertrand Russell wrote, “The very best proof that something can be done is the fact that others have already done it.”

The law of cause and effect says that for every effect there is a specific cause or causes.

This law says that everything happens for a reason. It says that success, business or personal, is not an accident. Failure is not an accident. Both have specific cause-and-effect relationships that explain them.

In its simplest form, the law of cause and effect says that if there is an effect in your life that you want, you merely have to trace that effect back and find someone who at one time did not have that effect. You find out what that person did to achieve the effect you desire.

What are the successful people doing on Social Media?

You then do the same things he or she did. If you do the same things other successful people do, eventually you will get the same results they do. It is no miracle. It is a matter of law.


Randomly posting things all over social media may be fine for a personal account, but for a business, you need to have a clear strategy in place for when you post.

  • Why you are posting.
  • What your are posting.
  • Who you are posting to.
  • Who you would like to post to.

Part of that may be to post some on the spot content – not everything has to be premeditated, and some of the best content happens on the move, in real time. Tweets at events, Instagram pics while you are wandering the streets in a new town, a Facebook post after you find out a really helpful piece of research that will help your community. However it should still fit with your overall brand message and plan, and be of relevance to your audience.


Do you know if your social media efforts are worthwhile?

Can social media be measured? Of course it can. But it’s not always easy.

Brand Health

Do you know how people are talking about your service, your products or customer experience?

Marketing Optimization

Social media listening can help you fine-tune your marketing efforts to better find your target audience. For many businesses, Google Analytics might be the best tool.

Your goal is to determine what terms people are searching and from what sites they are coming to your site. Some of the things to optimize are campaigns, content, channels, timing and influencers.

Key examples of social media metrics to track include:

  • Reach
  • Site traffic
  • Leads generated
  • Sign-ups and conversions
  • Revenue generated
  • Likes, Share, Comments
  • FB Insights

It’s important for social data to be relevant to stakeholders within your organization, not just social media practitioners. Tying social media to the big picture by linking it to organizational and departmental goals will help you achieve that.

Setting goals

Here are some ideas on what to focus on:

Goal No. 1: Increase social media engagement

  • Social media metrics to measure: Likes, Shares, Comments, Retweets, Mentions, Favorites

Goal No. 2: Increase customer acquisition on your website

  • Social media metrics to measure: URL clicks and traffic from social media

Goal No. 3: Increase brand awareness

  • Social media metrics to measure: Follower growth rate, percentage change over time in followers, Twitter sentiment, reach by region, clicks by region

Make adjustments

Once you’ve identified what works and what doesn’t work for your organization on social, it’s time to adjust your strategy. The point of tracking your social media ROI isn’t just to prove your social campaigns are valuable, it’s to increase their value over time. Go back and take a look at the goals of your specific campaign and evaluate how they tie-into the organization’s overall goals.


The great truths of life are simple.

It is amazing how many problems, both personal and social, could be resolved if everyone decided to treat other people the way they would like to be treated.

  • Listen to people the way you would like to be listened to.
  • Like, Share and Comment on other peoples social media posts.
  • Sell your products and services the way you would like others to sell their products and services to you.
  • Be courteous and respectful to other people, just as you would like them to be courteous and respectful to you.
  • Be patient and understanding with people when they make mistakes, just as you would like them to be patient and understanding with you when you make mistakes.

So what’s driving you?

About Blair

 5 Golden Rules for Sharing on Social Media

Blair Evan Ball is a Social Media Coach and founder of Prepare1, a company that works with businesses, individuals and non-profits. He is a former executive with a Fortune 50 company, and his national division did $1Billion+ in sales annually.

Blair has written three e-books: Facebook for Business Made Easy, Facebook Pages for Business Made Easy, and WordPress Blog Setup Made Easy.

Blair also educates, trains entrepreneurs and business professionals how to amplify their brand, increase revenues, and raise more funds.

 5 Golden Rules for Sharing on Social MediaThe Race is ON! | PREPARE | Get into the Game and WIN!

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What is the “comfort zone” exactly?

Why is it that we tend to get comfortable with the familiar and our routines, but when we’re introduced to new and interesting things, the glimmer fades so quickly?

I remember when Social Media first came on the scene. I instinctively knew it could have a profound affect on the way we communicate and interact with one another. Given the Internet was the engine that powered the change. My learning kicked in. Was it uncomfortable? Yes! Was it worth it? Yes!

Imagine life without it…Imagine the innovations of the last 20 years.

Remember when the big clunky mobile phones came out? We had to learn some new things?

How about email back in the mid 90’s? Did you have to learn a new technology?

Some of you may remember further back with the fax machine. Did it take forever to produce a 1 page document? Technology is changing…rapidly, and those who fight it will be left behind. According to IBM we process more information in one year than our forefathers did in a lifetime.

All these were introduced into our work environment. It created stress. Did you embrace it or fight it?

Simply, your comfort zone is a behavioral space where your activities and behaviors fit a routine and pattern that minimizes stress and risk. It provides a state of mental security. You benefit in obvious ways: regular happiness, low anxiety, and reduced stress.

The idea of the comfort zone goes back to a classic experiment in psychology. Back in 1908, psychologists Robert M. Yerkes and John D. Dodson explained that a state of relative comfort created a steady level of performance In order to maximize performance, however, we need a state of relative anxiety—a space where our stress levels are slightly higher than normal.

Dare to Push Your Comfort Zone_Prepare1 Image

This space is called “Optimal Anxiety,” and it’s just outside our comfort zone. Too much anxiety and we’re too stressed to be productive, and our performance drops off sharply.

The idea of optimal anxiety isn’t anything new. Anyone who’s ever pushed themselves to get to the next level or accomplish something knows that when you really challenge yourself, you can turn up amazing results.

More than a few studies support the point. However, pushing too hard can actually cause a negative result, and reinforce the idea that challenging yourself is a bad idea. It’s our natural tendency to return to an anxiety neutral, comfortable state. You can understand why it’s so hard to kick your brain out of your comfort zone.

“Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.”
– Brian Tracy


I remember our youngest son Bryce challenging us to eat something different years ago. That’s when I got into sushi. Who would have thought? Now I love it, but I must have it with some spice so that’s where spicy mayo comes in. Spice up your daily things!

  • Take a different route to work.
  • Try a new workout routine.
  • Read a different book.
  • Turn off the TV for an hour.
  • Make a new friend.
  • Shut off your phone for???

I know…that’s a hard one. Right?

Sometimes we need to get back to being more focused and simple.


Remember when you were a kid, you could be or do anything. Right?

What happened?

Life has a way of stealing our dreams, but it doesn’t have to be.

Refuse to compromise on your personal dreams.

Complacency will kill your dreams_480X250 - Prepare1 Image


Think in terms of possibilities.

The first form of courage is the courage to dream big dreams and to set big goals. This is where most people are stopped. The very idea of setting big, challenging, exciting, worthwhile goals is so overwhelming that they quit before they even begin.

But this is not for you. Sit down, write out your goals as if anything were possible for you, and never be afraid to dream big dreams.

It seems that failure tends to be more public than success. Or at least that’s what we perceive it to be. We fret it, we try to avoid it, and we question ourselves every time we have unconventional ideas. But the simple truth is – no great success was ever achieved without failure.

It may be one epic failure. Or a series of failures – such as Edison’s 10,000 attempts to create a light bulb or Dyson’s 5,126 attempts to invent a bagless vacuum cleaner. But, whether we like it or not, failure is a necessary stepping stone to achieving our dreams.



Overcoming fear is essential to your success. The future belongs to the risk-takers, not the security seekers.  Life is perverse in the sense that, the more you seek security, the less of it you have.  But the more you seek opportunity, the more likely it is that you will achieve the security that you desire.

Get away from negative people, people who are always pointing out the reasons to be insecure and afraid to stop worrying.  Control your suggestive environment carefully, and especially your human environment, if you wish to become the exceptional person you can be.

Confidence_Prepare1 Image


One of the most powerful techniques ever developed to overcoming fear, stop worrying, and relieving stress is what one of Brian Tracy students called the “worry buster.” Many people have come back and said that this simple method has changed their attitudes from negative to positive and enabled them to be more effective in their work and their personal lives than they had ever thought possible.


You need the courage to turn toward danger continuously. Identify all the fear situations in your life that cause you stress or anxiety today. Decide what the worst possible outcome of each of these situations might be.

Resolve to accept the worst, should it occur. And then take action to resolve each of those situations. Refuse to allow a fear situation to remain in your life, dominating your thinking and emotions and holding you back.

“Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” – Denis Waitley


It’s no surprise, then, that our culture is hostile to silence.  Everywhere we go, it seems, we’re confronted with some kind of noise—whether it’s background music in stores and restaurants, cars and airplanes going by, or something else.

And when we’re alone, we often find ourselves habitually looking at our phones. Just take a look around others when you are at a restaurant. We’re always ready to fill the emptiness.


However, the ability to be with silence is critical to getting our work done efficiently and enjoyably.  My sense is that, for most of us, our work requires us to spend large amounts of time focusing on a single task in silence.

Although phone calls and e-mails come in occasionally, the bulk of our time is devoted to working on that report, making the sale, a presentation, or other creative project.

f we haven’t learned to tolerate quiet, we get jittery and distractible, and find ourselves putting off our work to avoid the experience.  As psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi puts it in Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, “unless one learns to tolerate and even enjoy being alone, it is very difficult to accomplish any task that requires undivided concentration.” But when emptiness no longer bothers us, we can hold our attention on our task with little effort.



How do we get accustomed to silence?  One useful exercise, I’ve found, is to start eliminating all the ways we create background noise in our lives outside work.

  • Shut the door to your office
  • Shut off your music
  • Unplug the internet
  • Turn off your phone.

Just focus on doing the most important thing you can do today while enjoying the silence.

Silence is your treasure. Do not exchange it for an easy life.


How long has it been since you learned a new skill?

There is a rule that says:

“Whatever got you to where you are today is not enough to get you any further.”

What this means is that your current level of knowledge and skill has been sufficient to enable you to achieve your current income and standard of living.

But for you to improve your income and your standard of living, for you to move onward and upward, you must learn and apply the new skills that are essential for professional and personal growth.

new-skills_prepare1-imageThere is no other way to get ahead except for you to become better at what you do, continually throughout your life.

There’s another rule that says:

“For life to get better, you must get better.”

The good news however is that there are no limits to how much better you can become.

Therefore, there are no limits to how much more you can change your life, if you have the determination and the discipline to do so, every single day. Every day, in every way, you should be looking for ways to change your life and increase your personal knowledge.

Learning something new creates some stress. Fear of the unknown. What will other people think? Will I fail at this.

  • Have you wanted to learn a new Social Media Platform? Take action. Start
  • Have you wanted to learn a new language? Take action. Start
  • Have you always wanted to play a musical instrument? Take action. Start
  • Have you always wanted to learn a new skill? Take action. Start
  • Have you always wanted to run a marathon? Take action. Start

In the final analysis, a person who takes a single action as the result of a new idea or insight is far more valuable than the person who learns a hundred ideas but does nothing.


Most people never get where they want to be in their life, their career and their finances because they stop at places that appear to be comfortable.

The survivors in life and business refuse to settle for “comfortable” and are always reinventing themselves, pushing the edges, trying new things, making new investments and swinging for the fences. The survivors are always attacking the market for new clients and new territory, using new social media platforms—they’re never satisfied with the status quo.

In the end, remember: Keep your mind open to change all of the time, Dale Carnegie advises. “Welcome it. Court it. It is only by examining and re-examining your opinions and ideas that you can progress.”

About Blair

 5 Golden Rules for Sharing on Social Media

 5 Golden Rules for Sharing on Social Media

Blair Evan Ball is a Social Media Coach and founder of Prepare1, a company that works with businesses, individuals and non-profits. He is a former executive with a Fortune 50 company, and his national division did $1Billion+ in sales annually.

Blair has written three e-books: Facebook for Business Made Easy, Facebook Pages for Business Made Easy, and WordPress Blog Setup Made Easy.

Blair also educates, trains entrepreneurs and business professionals how to amplify their brand, increase revenues, and raise more funds.

 5 Golden Rules for Sharing on Social MediaThe Race is ON! | PREPARE | Get into the Game and WIN!

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When you were younger and pictured yourself at this point in your life, did you picture the life you are living right NOW?

You work hard every single day, maybe each day even harder than the last…so do your efforts match what you have to show for it?

“The primary reason for failure is that people do not develop new plans to replace those plans that didn’t work.” (Napoleon Hill)

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